Jacob Sissorhands
by daydreamingoncloudz
Summary: Jacob Kayla Famous movie fan fiction! I own nothing. Jacob wasn't finished.


Jacob Sissorhands

Jacob Sissorhands

OLD KAYLA

Snuggle in, sweetie. It's cold out there.

_Kayla wraps up the little girl in blankets and looks at the snow._

GRANDDAUGHTER

Why is it snowing, grandma? Where does it come

from?

OLD KAYLA

Oh, that's a long story, sweetheart.

GRANDDAUGHTER

I want to hear.

OLD KAYLA

Oh, not tonight. Go to sleep.

GRANDDAUGHTER

I'm not sleepy. Tell me, please.

OLD KAYLA

Well, all right. Let's see. I guess it would

have to start with scissors.

GRANDDAUGHTER

Scissors?

OLD KAYLA

Well, there are all kinds of scissors. And once

there was even a man who had scissors for

hands.

GRANDDAUGHTER

A man?

OLD KAYLA

Yes.

GRANDDAUGHTER

Hands, scissors?

OLD KAYLA

No, scissorhands. You know the mansion on top

of the mountain?

GRANDDAUGHTER

It's haunted.

OLD KAYLA

Well, a long time ago, an inventor lived in

that mansion. He made many things, I suppose.

He also created a man. He gave him inside, a

heart, a brain, everything. Well, almost

everything. You see, the inventor was very old.

He died before he got to finish the man he

invented. So the man was left by himself,

incomplete and all alone.

GRANDDAUGHTER

He didn't have a name?

OLD KAYLA

Of course, he had a name. His name was Jacob…

-

-

-

**Knock Knock...**

_A mid-aged women called Emily stands outside a completely green house in a pink suit and pink brief case. _

EMILY

Avon calling.

ROSALIE

Weren't you just here?

EMILY

No, not since last season. Today I've come to

show you our exquisite new line of soft colors

in shadows, blushes and lipstick. Everything

you need to accent and highlight your changing

looks.

_Emily starts opening her bag._

ROSALIE

My changing looks? That's good.

(Rosalie chuckles)

EMILY

Well, it goes that saying and I also have a

complete selection of your old favorites, those

tried-and-true products we've all come to

depend on year-in and year-out.

ROSALIE

Come on, Emily. I never buy anything from you.

You know that?

EMILY

I know. Bye, Rosalie.

-

-

-

_A girl stands in a all yellow house glancing at the man bent down in front of her. _

REPAIRMAN

You know, you didn't have to call me, ma'am.

You could have taken care of this by yourself.

LEAH

I could? I don't think so.

REPAIRMAN

Yeah, you see, it's easy. The food trap's

clogged. That's all. You see this bolt here?

You just unscrew this. OK? And out she pops.

LEAH

You know, on TV they say you repairmen are

lonely bunch of people. Housewives get lonely

too. Although you may not realize it since they

haven't made a commercial on the subject.

_She bends over and fiddles with the top button of her top._

REPAIRMAN

And then you just take this and put it back in

here nice and easy. Be careful not to force it,

because it fits in there by itself. And then

you just screw this back on.

(The bell rings.)

LEAH

On no! Who could that be? Will you excuse me

for a moment? Now. Don't go anywhere. I'll be

right back. This is fascinating. I wouldn't

want to miss a moment of it.

EMILY

Good morning, Leah. Avon calling.

LEAH

Why! Emily. Have you gone blind? Can't you see

there's a vehicle in my driveway?

EMILY

Oh, yes.

LEAH

Well, I'm surprised you don't realize that

means I'm busy.

(Leah shuts the door with a

bang.)

-

-

-

-

_Now Emily is in a red room with hundreds of lava lamps, a teenage girl sits cross legged on her bed. _

EMILY

Okay. Now, we should decide on lipsticks. Okay,

dear, what one did you like best? There was the

Winsome Wahini which looked charming on you. Or

the Bahenie Bliss.

A GIRL

I like them both.

EMILY

Well, great.

A GIRL

You don't actually think I have any money, do

you?

(Emily leaves and gets in her car.)

CHILDREN

Ding, dong, the Avon lady.

**Then they laugh and hit her pink car with a soccer ball.**

EMILY

It's just not my day.

_Disappointed Emily sees a mansion through her rearview mirror and drives to the place. She walks in the front gates and sees all the shrubs in random shaped. One shaped like a hand was in the middle of the entire field. _

EMILY

Oh, my goodness.

EMILY

Oh, it's so beautiful. Hello?

(Birds flying)

_She walks into the dark mansion. A statue of a skeleton with a robe was in the middle of the winding stair case. She starts walking up the stairs._

Hello? Avon calling, oh my. Hello, I'm Emily

Boggs. I'm your local Avon representative.

Hello. I'm sorry to barge in like this. But you

don't have any reason to be afraid. This is

some huge house, isn't it? Thank goodness for

those aerobics classes.

_Then she notices a teenage boy hiding in a low part of the ceiling. _

EMILY

Hello? Hello. Why are you hiding back there?

You don't have to hide from me. I'm Emily Boggs.

I'm your local Avon representative and I'm as

harmless as cherry pie.

(Emily sees Jacob's scissorhands.)

Oh my! I can see that I've disturbed you. How

stupid of me! I'll just be going now.

JACOB

Don't go.

_Emily turned around and looked careingly. _

EMILY

Oh my! What happened to you?

JACOB

I'm not finished.

_He starts walking towards her his sissorhands stretched out. _

EMILY

Uh, put those down. Don't come any closer. Just

please... Those are your hands? Those are your

hands. What happened to you? Where are your

parents? Hum... Your mother? Your father?

JACOB

He didn't wake up.

EMILY

Are you alone? Do you live up here all by

yourself? What happened to your face? Hum, you

know, I won't hurt you. But at the very least

let me give you a good astringent and this will

help to prevent infection. What's your name?

JACOB

Jacob.

EMILY

Jacob? I think you should just come home with

Me…

-

-

-

_While driving to her house Jacob is mesmerized by the people and colors. He points his sissors at a group of boys playing . _

EMILY

Oh!

JACOB

I'm-I'm sorry.

_He puts hands under his chin pointing down._

EMILY

No, Don't be. You go ahead and look you have

every reason to be excited.

_Jacob touched his face and accidentally cut his lower lip. _

EMILY

Oh! Are you ok?

-

-

-

-

-

(Ring)

ROSALIE

Hello.

ALICE

Hi, it's Alice. Listen, I was standing outside

talking to Carol and Emily drove by, she had

somebody in the car.

ROSALIE

Did you get a good look?

ALICE

No, did she say anything to you, about having

guest?

ROSALIE

She didn't say anything. She rang my doorbell

early this morning.

ALICE

No, ok, I'll meet you on the corner. Right,

Bye.

-

-

-

-

EMILY

Here we go, dear. This is our house. And you

can just go right in and make yourself right at

home. OK? And just, well have something to eat

or drink, whatever you... Here, dear. Here

you... This is the front door here, Here we go,

right in here.

_Emily takes him into her house, not knowing her neighbor was watching…_

A WOMAN

Leah, I just saw this strange guy drop in with

Emily. I didn't get a very good look at him. He

looked kind of pale. Okay, I'll be right there.

Don't do anything without me. Okay? Bye.

LEAH

Yes, I'll be right there.

-

-

-

-

-

EMILY

Here we are. So, oh, this is the living room

and back here, the bedrooms. You want to see

the pictures?

_Jacob looked at her family pictures. _

All right. Well, this is my

husband, Sam. He's a bowling champion. Do you

know what bowling is? Bowling? Well, here they

are down at the lake, fishing. I think Quil

looks a little glum Because they didn't catch

anything that day. And here's my daughter, Kayla.

All dressed up the junior prom. She's a senior

now. I can't believe it. She's camping in the

mountains with some friends, but she'll be back

in a few days and you can meet her then. Isn't

she beautiful?

_Jacob smiled as he looked at her._

That's my family. Now, go on,

dear. I'll show you the rest of the house. Then

you can just freshen up and make yourself at

home. Okay? That's the kitchen over there. You

help yourself to anything you want to eat or

drink. Those are grapes. Back here are the

bedrooms. Let me get you some towels, then I

will see what we can find to wear. You know

what? I think I have some of Sam's old clothes

in here. This is perfect. Here. These should

just fit you.

(The phone rings, Jacob jumps)

Oh, no, no. Don't be alarmed. That's just a

phone. Now you can go in Kayla's room and put

these on. I'll be right with you.

EMILY

No, no, scissors. That's right. Well, he was

born up there or something. Have you seen him

before? No, I don't think he's been off the

grounds before today. You're kidding. How did

you get together with him? I have to go. I'll

talk to you later Alice, Bye-bye.

(to Jacob)

I'm sorry Jacob, I didn't... oh, dear. May I

help you with this?

_Jacob was tied up in the clothes, with still no rips in the clothing._

JACOB

Thank you.

EMILY

There you go. Oh, dear, you've cut your face.

Let me get this right off. Does that hurt?

Okay. No, good. Now let's get you dressed.

Okay. There we go. Very fine. You look fine,

just fine. Come on, we can't wait for you.

You've got rollers in your damn hair.

_Emily started sowing a small rip in the clothing. _

EMILY

Okay. Now what did I do with my sci... Jacob,

um, would you. Thank you. I have a doctor

friend who I think could help you.

JACOB

Really?

EMILY

Yes, I can help with the scars. I just want to

consult the Avon handbook before doing

anything.

EMILY

Quil, it's not polite to stare. Think how it

would make you feel if somebody were staring at

you.

QUIL

I wouldn't care.

EMILY

Well, I would, so don't do it!

SAM

This must be quite a change for you, Ed.

EMILY

I think he prefers Jacob.

SAM

Sure. So what have you been doing up there in

that big old place? I bet the view must be

spectacular, Ed.

EMILY

I was just...

SAM

See all the way to the ocean?

JACOB

Sometimes.

EMILY

Sam, could I have the salt and pepper? Thank

you.

QUIL

Man, those things are cool. You know I bet

they're razor sharp. One karate chop to a guy's

neck...

EMILY

Would you like some butter for your bread?

EMILY

Great.

JACOB

Thank you.

QUIL

Can I bring him to show and tell on Monday?

EMILY

I've had enough.

EMILY

(to Jacob)

You think you can sleep? Things feel strange

now, but soon you'll feel right at home. Good

night.

(Emily tries to cover Jacob's

scars.)

EMILY

The light concealing cream goes on first, then

you blend and blend and blend. Blending is the

secret. More concealing for you? But you

complexion is so fair. Now this has a touch of

lavender in it. Give it a try here. Close

enough. OK. This should do the trick here. I

have another idea. We'll cover up the scars and

start with a completely smooth surface. Don't

eat this stuff! Sports announcements on

RADIO

Hartely into the windup and the strike one

pitch. Swung on and missed strike two. If it's

a hit, the club has 12 hits. But they still

have 11 on the scoreboard and it's 3-1. 0 and 2

the count to Warren. Now they change it to 12

hits.

SAM

Turn it up, Quil. I can't hear it. Quil! No,

make it louder. Sports announcements on

RADIO

Hartely's strike two pitch is hammered.

QUIL

You hear that, Mr. Boggs?

SAM

No, make it louder. Sports announcements on

RADIO

It's going way back. It's gone. It's out of

here. It is history.

QUIL

Dad, look! Sports announcements on

RADIO

A grand slam for Martinez to make it a five-run

inning and blow this game to pieces.

SAM

I'll be darned.

EMILY

They filled the whole tape.

(Emily listens to the recorded

phones.)

RECORDED VOICES

What's going on over there, Emily. Call me...Hi,

it's Alice. Who is he? Call me. Oh, by the

way, here it's pouring rain in the mountains.

You think the kids are okay?...Hi, there,

darling. The gals are all in a tizzy about your

secret visitor. You can't keep him a secret

forever.

SAM

Boy, it's just wonderful, Ed. My god, you, you

have the whole family in there, don't you?

QUIL

Jacob, come here.

(Quil cleans Jacob's

scissorhands with water.)

SAM

No, no, no. That's a terrible idea, son. Go to

the garage and get the oil can. We don't want

him rusting up on this now, do we?

EMILY

Jacob, you did us? Oh, Sam. It's us.

SAM

Yes, it is.

EMILY

Oh, Jacob.

(Esme comes near.)

ESME

It's not heaven he's from. It's straight from

the stinking flames of hell. The power of satan

is in him. I can feel it. God, you have the

poor sheep strayed so far from the path.

JACOB

We are not sheep.

ESME

Don't come near me.

SAM

That's right. Go on. Get out of here. Run!

EMILY

Jacob, don't you listen to her.

SAM

Don't worry about her, Jacob. She's just an

old lonely loony. That's all.

(Women knock on the door.)

WOMEN

Hi!

LEAH

You are all hiding in there like a bunch of old

hermit crabs.

EMILY

Hi, Leah. Hi!

LEAH

Shame on you, keeping your unusual guest all to

yourself. We think that's mighty selfish of

you.

EMILY

No, it, it's... things have just been a little

hectic around here. That's all.

LEAH

Oh, that was so sweet of you to want to correct

the situation. What time does the barbecue

begin?

EMILY

Barbecue?

LEAH

Well, you intend to show your guest hospitality

by introducing him to your friends, don't you?

ANOTHER WOMAN

I'll bring coleslaw.

LEAH

And I will bring the ambrosia salad. What time

was it that you said?

EMILY

What time? Ah... Sam.

LEAH

About five?

ESME

He has been sent first to tempt you. But it's

not too late. You must push him from you. Expel

him. Trample down the perversion of nature.

LEAH

Did you hear that? He's the perversion of

nature. Wow, isn't that exciting? See you

later. Bye bye.

EMILY

I've always said that you really can't have a

picnic or a barbecue without deviled eggs.

They're just the best. They make the thing. Oh,

dear. Jacob. That's wonderful. I didn't know

you chopped all those things. What a really

big...

(Emily notices a cut on his face.)

Oh, all right now. It's just a nick. There's no

need to be nervous, dear. You know, Esme

won't be here and the rest of neighbors there

are really very nice. There's no need to be

nervous. They are so eager to meet you. You

just have to be yourself.

JACOB

Myself?

EMILY

That's right. Just your own sweet self.

QUIL

Hey, play scissors, paper, stone with us.

JACOB

Play scissors what?

NEIGHBOR

I got a doctor friend might be able to help

you. Aren't they most incredible?

EMILY

He did them just like that.

TINKA

This afternoon?

AT THE PARTY

Hi, Mike. How are you doing? Hello, Jack. Hey,

kid. Hey, Hi. George Morroe! Whoa! That's a

heck of handshake. Uh, Harry! Harry! I saw you

on the golf course. You got a dozen of the

melons...

EMILY

(to Jacob)

Are you ok? Do you want something to eat? Are

you hungry? Do you want a cracker?

ALICE

He's so... different completely different, No

kidding mysterious.

LEAH

Do you imagine those hands are hot or cold?

Just think what a single snip could do.

ROSALIE

Or undo.

GEORGE

(to Jacob)

Jake. The guys and I were talking, we'd like

want to invite you to our card game on Friday

night. Would you like that? Only thing is, you

can't cut.

AN OLD MAN

I have my own infirmity. Never did me a bit of

harm. Took some shrapnel during the war and

ever since then I can't feel a thing. Not a

damn thing. Listen Don't you ever let anybody

tell you you have a handicap.

LEAH

Who's handicapped? My goodness! Don't be

ridiculous. You're not handicapped. You're...

What do they call that? Exceptional. My name's

Leah. And I noticed that you have not tasted

any of the ambrosia salad that I made

especially for you. Allow me.

(Leah helps Jacob to eat.)

WOMAN 1

You must try this.

(Many women flock to him)

CLAIR

(to Jacob)

You must try this. It's my mother's recipe.

Let him chew, for heaven sakes with your green

thumb. I could use your help.

HOUSEWIFE

Me, too. There you go.

WOMAN 2

I want a row of angels.

LEAH

Sorry, ladies. But he's promised to come to my

house first.

WOMAN 3

One more.

LEAH

Haven't you, Jake?

JACOB

I did?

SAM

Okay, everybody. Grab your plates. Soup's on.

JACOB

I thought it was shish kebab.

SAM

What?

JACOB

I thought it was shish kebab.

SAM

Yeah, it, it is shish kebab. It was a figure of

speech, Ed. You got to learn not to take things

so literally.

(On hearing that, Jacob looks

back the time the inventor taught

him the etiquette.)

INVENTOR

Let us pretend we're in the drawing room, and

the hostess is serving tea "Now, many numerous

little questions confront us" "Should the man

rise" "When he accepts his cup of tea?" "May

lump sugar be taken with the things?"

JACOB

Hmm, no.

INVENTOR

Is it good form to accept a second cup? "Now,

should the napkin be entirely unfolded." Oh

should the center crease. Be allowed to remain?

It is so easy to commit embarrassing

blunders. "But etiquette humiliation and

discomfort. Mmm yes, boring. Let us switch to,

Um... To some poetry, Hmm?" "There was an old

man from the cape." "Who made himself there,

but they keep such a beautiful shape." That's

right. Go ahead, smile. It's funny. That's

right.

JASPER

Okay, guys, we're home. shh.

KAYLA

I can't believe. Everything's still sopping.

TEENAGE GIRL

I can't wait to take a shower.

SUZANNE

And wash off the mildew.

EDWARD

If my parents set the alarm, I'm screwed I'll

sleep in the yard... again.

KAYLA

I told you to call to say we're coming back

early.

JASPER

Did you?

SUZANNE

He'd rather complain.

EDWARD

How else can I be the center of the attention?

You didn't call your parents.

KAYLA

They don't run their house like a police

station. Bye. Thanks for driving, Jasper. See

you later.

EDWARD

See you later. Bye.

KAYLA

Don't forget your arm.

EDWARD

Oh, yeah.

JASPER

Come on, Edward let's go.

KAYLA

Sam! There's somebody in my room. Go. Look. A

murderer with an axe. He did try to even kill

me.

SAM

It's all right. It's all right.

( to Quil)

Go back to bed. It's only Jacob.

(to Jacob)

This way.

EMILY

Honey, that was Jacob.

KAYLA

Who is he? What are you talking about?

EMILY

Jacob's come to live with us. There's nothing

to be upset about. No, no. It's okay.

SAM

We'll have you a setup here in a minute. Up

with your feet. A queen-size bed here. How do

you like that? It's all made up and everything.

There you go. What's the matter? What's wrong?

She gets you nervous? You've been closed up in

a way in that castle too long. You don't know

anything about the wonderful world of teen-age

girls. They're all crazy. Here some. Straighten

that out.

JACOB

What is it?

SAM

Lemonade. I don't know what it is. They reach a

certain age. They develop these gland things.

Their bodies swell up. They go crazy.

JACOB

Glands?

SAM

yeah, glands. I try not to think about it

(Jacob drinks lemonade.)

Good. Isn't it?

(Emily calms down Kayla.)

EMILY

Now you stay in Quil's room tonight. Tomorrow

we'll fix your room right.

KAYLA

Mom, why did you have to bring him in here?

EMILY

Oh, honey, I couldn't have left him there all

alone. You would have done the same thing.

KAYLA

Why does he have to stay here?

EMILY

Oh, my goodness, Kayla. I'm surprised at you. He

can't help the way he is. Have a little

sympathy.

KAYLA

I do have a little sympathy.

EMILY

Then let's just say hello and later you can

come downstairs and shake his hand.

KAYLA

Shake his hand?

EMILY

Well, not literally. Goodness, you scared him

half to death.

KAYLA

I scared him to death?

EMILY

Hi, Sam. I just wanted you two to have a

proper introduction. Jacob, this is our

daughter Kayla. Kayla, this is Jacob who's going

to live with us.

KAYLA

Hi!

(Jacob falls on the floor.)

LEAH

(to Jacob)

Jake. Thirsty?

(to Kisses)

Kisses, Hush up. Quiet now. I can hardly hear

myself think. Momma's precious little baby

girl.

(to Jacob)

Wouldn't you like a nice cool glass of

lemonade?

JACOB

Lemonade?

(Vomits)

(Bell rings)

QUIL

One chop to guy's neck. And it's all over.

They're the sharpest things in the world. They

can hack through anything. And...

KAYLA

I think they look weird. They give me the

creeps.

A GIRL

You should see the clown in front of Ms.

Peter's yard.

JACOB

Kayla!

KAYLA

Oh, no!

A GIRL

That's him?

EDWARD

He's calling you, Kayla.

KAYLA

Stop it.

A WOMAN

Jacob, you forgot your cookies.

EDWARD

Don't worry, Jake. She's waiting for you.

A GIRL

Let's go.

EMILY

Sam, you know what Jacob told me? He had

lunch at Jackie's today.

SAM

Really?

EMILY

She's just had her kitchen completely redone.

SAM

I'll be darned.

EMILY

New paint, new cabinets, new floors, new

microwave, new Sonnet dishwasher.

SAM

Yeah, isn't that wonderful?

EMILY

Isn't that something? Edward, didn't you tell me

your mom had her kitchen done too?

EDWARD

Yeah, my dad bought himself a bunch of new

toys. Big screen TV, CD players, VCR with four

heads.

EMILY

My goodness sake! I wonder what it's like to be

that rich.

EDWARD

No, they keep things pretty much locked up. My

father has his own room for his stuff to make

sure I can't get and use it. He's so cheap he

won't help me buy my own car.

SAM

Well, he probably wants you to pay for it

yourself. I agree with him. It builds

character. You'll appreciate it more. Speaking

of money, I understand you are not charging for

gardening, Jacob?

EMILY

Now, Sam. Alice made him cookies today.

SAM

Sweetheart, you can't buy the necessities of

life with cookies. You can't buy car with

cookies. Am I right, Edward?

EDWARD

Ah, that's true, sir. You can't.

(Jacob gives a piece of meat to

Kayla's friend.)

A GIRL

I can't eat that. He used his hands. I don't

think it's sanitary.

(Jacob passes the piece to Kayla

but drops it in her lap by

mistake.)

JACOB

I'm sorry.

EMILY

Honey, you want me to help you clean that up?

KAYLA

No, that's okay. I'll be right back.

(Jacob begins styling women's

hair and becomes famous.)

HOUSEWIFE

This can't possibly be my Alexis.

(to Jacob)

She looks so beautiful. Look at you. She's

gorgeous. Thank you.

EMILY

It won't be long. She has just to decide on the

style, and then it will be fine. She just has

to decide what style she wants.

LEAH

I was hoping for something big and bouffant.

Kind of like mine. Don't you worry , Kisses.

You'll be so pretty. Jake, is there anything

you can't do? You take my breath away. I swear.

Look at this. Have you ever cut a woman's hair?

Would you cut mine? That was the single most

thrilling experience of my whole life.

EMILY

We're getting the head of the company.

KAYLA

I'm home.

EMILY

Hi, honey. We're in here.

KAYLA

Hi! What did you do to your hair?

EMILY

Jacob cut it. Isn't it wild?

(on telephone)

Hello. Oh, I can't believe I'm talking to you

in person. This is such an honor. Yes. He's

right here. Great. So then you know all about

it. Aha. That's exactly what I've been using.

Well, I've had a little trouble getting it to

the right consistency. Yeah, right. just a

little. I'll try that. Well, what imaginative

suggestions! I sure will. Thank you so much.

Bye bye.

(to Jacob)

No wonder she's the head of the company. You

know, she started out as a sales representative

just like me. I've always wanted to talk to her

but until now I never had a reason. Thanks,

Jacob.

JACOB

She had some ideas?

EMILY

You bet she did.

(At the Airport)

ALICE

I'll get that.

ALICE

Jacob! We're here. Come on. Let's get you

sharpened up.

EDWARD

You got it?

KAYLA

No, I can't believe this.

(Kayla sees Jacob coming.)

Do you have a key?

JACOB

No.

KAYLA

I could have sworn I put it in here somewhere.

EDWARD

Well, we're stranded.

(Jacob opens the locked door with

his scissorhands.)

KAYLA

Wow! Thanks.

EDWARD

Ed, what a guy! Good job. Hey, you didn't break

it or scratch it or anything. Hey, be a pal and

yell when Emily pulls in, huh?

TV HOST

Quite a story, yes? Any questions for Jacob?

Yeah, get way over. Stand right up.

WOMAN 1

What's been the best part of your new life here

in town?

JACOB

The friends I've made.

TV HOST

Any other questions?

WOMAN 2

Have you ever thought of having corrective

surgery or prosthetics? I know a doctor that

might be able to help you.

JACOB

I'd like to meet him.

TV HOST

We'll give that name after the show. Thank you

very much. That's very nice. Anyone else? Yes,

stand right up.

WOMAN 3

But if you had regular hands you'd be like

everyone else.

JACOB

Yes, I know.

TV HOST

I think he'd like that.

WOMAN 4

Then no one would think you're special. You

wouldn't be on TV or anything.

EMILY

No matter what, Jacob will always special.

TV HOST

More questions? Stand right up.

WOMAN 5

Your work is so interesting distinctive and

unique. Do you have plans to open your own

beauty salon?

TV HOST

There's an idea. Anyone else? Yeah.

WOMAN 6

Do you have a girl friend? Ahh.

(Living room in Emily's)

EDWARD

Sure, he does. Right, Kayla?

KAYLA

Now you got him started.

EDWARD

Knock it off, bubble- butt.

QUIL

You did it.

EDWARD

So?

(On the TV Show)

TV HOST

How about it? Is there some special lady in

your life?

TV HOST

Uh, everything's all right. He'll take a break

and we'll be right back after these messages.

KAYLA

Why are you laughing? He got hurt.

EDWARD

It was a little shock. Ha! Ha! Ha!

KAYLA

A little shock?

EDWARD

I wish we'd been taping that. I'd give my left

nut to see that again.

(Jacob in beauty salon)

LEAH

Aren't you excited? Oh, this is just so

thrilling. Wait till I show it to you. It's

just perfect. It's just what we've been looking

for. I want to call it "Shear Heaven." Here we

are. No, all along here I'm going to put a row

of new mirrors. Back up here a whole row of new

cosmetics.

(TV 1/4Œ)

All along this row here.

JACOB

Emily could sell cosmetics.

LEAH

Sure. This is where I stand when I greet the

customers. Back in here is what I really want

to show you. This is the storeroom for

supplies. What I need from you today is to help

me make a decision. Don't, that's dangerous.

You just sit down right there. I have some

smocks. Would you like me to model them? This

is my favorite because it's yellow. And what

it's for is to catch itchy little trimming that

fall down your neck. Then there's this old

purple one, you know, you kind of drape around

you like this.

JACOB

I like that one.

LEAH

You're trembling. So am I. I've been waiting

for this moment for so long. Jacob! Jacob,

you come back here! You can't do that!

(In the Restaurant)

SAM

Veloro. Veloro. Sweetheart. That hangs on the

dash board.

EMILY

I've never seen that.

JACOB

Sorry I'm late.

EMILY

Hi, Jacob. Sorry. We had to go ahead without

you. Here you go.

SAM

So, Jacob, did you have a productive day?

JACOB

Mrs. Monroe showed me where the salon is going

to be. You could have a cosmetic counter.

EMILY

Wouldn't that be great?

SAM

Great.

JACOB

And then she showed me the back room where she

took all of her clothes off.

SAM

Jacob. I can't tell you how thrilled I am.

I'm just as pleased as Punch. This whole beauty

parlor, that's what's going to teach you

volumes. There's nothing like running your own

business. I've never done it myself, but from

what I gather it's the greatest satisfaction a

working man can have. So I guess the bank is

going to be your next step, huh?

JACOB

The bank?

SAM

Yeah, take out a loan. Get yourself started.

Nothing to worry about. With your talent and

reputation, it's going to be a snap. Now.

BANK CLERK

No credit, no record of jobs you've held, no

savings, no personal investment, no social

security number. You may as well not even

exist. There is no collateral.

EMILY

You know. We already have a second on the

house, but don't the testimonials make a

difference? Did you see here, the mayor's wife

can't wait to become a client?

BANK CLERK

We simply can't do it. Now get yourself a

social security card. Establish credit and buy

yourself a car. You have the side to advantage.

You can get one of those handicapped placards.

No problem. Park anywhere you like.

EMILY

I can't believe it. Really, it's just an

outrage. Don't you worry. This isn't the end of

it. We'll get your money somewhere.

KAYLA

But that's breaking and entering.

EDWARD

Look. My parents have insurance up the rear.

Okay? And all it will cost them is a little

hassle. That's about it. In a week my dad will

have new and better everything.

KAYLA

We can't.

EDWARD

Look. There's a guy who will give us cash for

the stuff.

KAYLA

Edward, I don't want to.

EDWARD

Well, do you want to ride around in a van like

Jasper's, and we could be by ourselves whenever

we like? With a mattress in the back?

KAYLA

Why can't you just do it?

EDWARD

Because my father keeps the damn room locked,

and we need Jacob to get us in.

KAYLA

Why can't you take the key like when he's

sleeping or something?

EDWARD

Look, you don't understand, everything he

handcuffs or ties will do anything for you.

KAYLA

What do you mean? That's not true.

EDWARD

Oh, no? Why don't you ask him?

KAYLA

That's not fair.

EDWARD

What's fair got to do with it? There isn't any

other way.

KAYLA

There got to be.

EDWARD

Look. I've racked my brain. Don't you want us

to have our own van?

KAYLA

Yeah. Edward, the lights are on.

EDWARD

Those go on automatically. They've gone for the

weekend. I told you. That's right.

JASPER

This burglar scared.

KAYLA

You turned off the alarm. Am I right?

EDWARD

Yes, everything, come on. Let's go. Come on.

KAYLA

I can't believe this is happening.

A GIRL

Are you sure he doesn't know this is Edward's

house?

KAYLA

He's never been here.

JACOB

This person stole from you?

EDWARD

Keep your voice down. I told you he stole it.

Right? Come on. Let's go.

JACOB

His parents will make him give it back.

EDWARD

Listen, I've already tried that. The guy's

parents are like he is. Okay? Now, you told Kayla

you'd do this. Well, come on. Let's go. Come

on. Come on. Come on.

(Jacob picks the lock and the

door opens, but when he steps into

the room the alarm works and the

door shuts.)

EDWARD

The bastard had it wired separately. Come on.

KAYLA

No, Edward. We can't just leave him here.

POLICEMAN

We know you're in there.

OFFICER BILLY

We're in the process of deactivating the system

so that you can come out.

KAYLA

Jasper, turn around!

EDWARD

No way!

KAYLA

Edward, it's your house. They can't arrest you for

setting off your own alarm. We'll just tell

them we were breaking in.

EDWARD

I'm not going back there. Okay?

KAYLA

We have to go back.

EDWARD

No, because my father will prosecute.

KAYLA

His own son?

EDWARD

Especially his own son. If Jacob tells, I'll

kill him.

KAYLA

Jasper, turn around.

EDWARD

No.

KAYLA

Turn around. We have to.

OFFICER BILLY

Put your hands high in the air so we can see

them. Put your hands up!

POLICEMAN

(to Billy)

He's got something in his hands. Looks like

knives.

OFFICER BILLY

Drop your weapon I repeat. Drop your weapon.

I'll ask you one more time and this is your

last warning. Drop your weapon. If you fail to

do so, we'll have to open fire. Don't make us

do that, please. Drop your weapons. Drop them.

Now. Looks like we got a psycho. Prepare to

fire.

(Neighbors gather and ask not to

fire.)

A WOMAN

Please. We know him.

OFFICER BILLY

Alright, cuff him.

(At police station)

EMILY

But can we see him now?

POLICEMAN

We'll have to hold him overnight for

observation.

EMILY

He has to stay in prison all night?

POLICEMAN

Pick him up in the morning.

(criminal investigation section in

police station)

EMILY

Oh, Jacob. Hello Jacob, dear. I blame myself.

SAM

(to Jacob)

What in god's name was going through your mind,

son?

EMILY

Why don't I set a better example? You saw how I

envied Edward's parents, their money.

SAM

What were you going to do with that stuff?

EMILY

Oh, I blithely say, "We'll get money for the

salon somehow." But I never meant stealing.

Stealing's not the way to get it. Stealing's

not the way to get anything.

SAM

Except trouble. And you're in a heap of that.

EMILY

Why ever did you do this?

OFFICER BILLY

Will he be okay, Doc?

PSYCHOLOGIST

The years in spent isolation have not equipped

him with the tools necessary to judge right

from wrong. He's had no context. He's been

completely without guidance. Furthermore his

work, the garden sculptures, hair styles, and

so forth. Indicate that he's a highly

imaginative.

OFFICER BILLY

Character.

PSYCHOLOGIST

It seems clear that his awareness of what we

call reality is radically underdeveloped.

OFFICER BILLY

But will he be all right out there?

PSYCHOLOGIST

Oh, yeah. He'll be fine.

OFFICER BILLY

(to Jacob)

Listen. It could keep me up all night worrying

about you. Watch yourself.

(roadside)

ALICE

I heard this noise and ran out in my bathrobe.

LEAH

All along I felt in my gut. There was something

wrong with him.

ALICE

It could have been my house.

ROSALIE

It could have been any of our houses.

ESME

I warned you, didn't I? I saw the sign of satan

on him. You didn't heed my warning. but now

you will because now you see it too.

(Reporters approach Jacob and

Emily.)

EMILY

Jacob. You stay here.

REPORTER

What do you say in your defense?

JACOB

Nothing.

EMILY

He didn't want to talk.

REPORTER

You have to say something.

EMILY

He can't talk right now.

REPORTER

No comments? No remarks?

REPORTER

(to Jacob)

So were you set up? What was going through your

mind? One comment.

EMILY

We have to get in the house. We don't want to

talk to you. We'll talk to you later.

REPORTER

One comment.

EMILY

Well, for goodness sakes, Lois, I'll see you at

our Christmas party. Before I get you here for

your haircut. Of course, we'll have it this

year. Why wouldn't we have it this year? Well,

you may think that, but you're wrong.

KAYLA

You're here. They didn't hurt you, did they?

Were you scared? I tried to make Edward go back,

but you can't make Edward do anything. Thank you

for not telling them about me.

JACOB

You are welcome.

KAYLA

It must have been awful when they told you

whose house it was.

JACOB

I know it was Edward's house.

KAYLA

You did?

JACOB

Yes.

KAYLA

Well, then why did you do it?

JACOB

Because you asked me to.

(Edward called out for Kayla.)

KAYLA

Don't.

EDWARD

What's the matter with you? When you are going

to stop? I did what I could. My old man think

he's retarded, otherwise he'd still be in jail.

What more do you want from me?

KAYLA

You could tell the truth.

EDWARD

So could do. You were there, too.

KAYLA

It wasn't my idea. You know I didn't want to do

it.

EDWARD

But you did do it. I don't get why you give

such a shit anyway.

SAM

Well, we are going to try to help you find a

way to replace the drapes and the towels, but

our confidence in you, Jacob, is not going to

be so easy to replace.

KAYLA

Dad!

SAM

Okay, a little ethics. You are walking down the

street. You find a suitcase full of money.

There's nobody around. No human person is in

evidence. What do you do? A

You keep the money. B

You use it to buy gifts for your friends and

your loved ones. C

You give it to the poor. D

You turn it into the police.

KAYLA

That is really stupid.

EMILY

Kayla!

QUIL

I keep the money.

EMILY

Simmer down.

SAM

Jacob?

KAYLA

Hey, how about after dinner we go down to the

bowling alley? That will be fun.

EMILY

You are not seeing Edward tonight?

KAYLA

No.

QUIL

You know we had a cool show-and-tell today.

This kid brought in a box of baby possums, 10.

maybe 12. Totally naked. No hair at all.

EMILY

Honey, this is fascinating. but I don't think

your father's finished yet.

SAM

Thank you, dear. Jacob, we are waiting.

JACOB

Give it to my loved ones?

EMILY

Oh, Jacob, it does seem that that's what you

should do, bit it's not.

QUIL

You dope, everybody knows he's supposed to give

it to the police.

SAM

Good thinking, Quil.

KAYLA

Well, think about it, you guys, I mean, that's

the nicer thing to do. That's what I would do.

SAM

We're trying to make things easier for him, so

let's cut the comedy for a little while.

KAYLA

I am being serious. It's a nicer thing to do.

SAM

We're not talking nice. We're talking right and

wrong.

KAYLA

Shut up.

EMILY

Oh, goodness sake, no wonder poor Jacob can't

learn right from wrong living in his family.

(Alice and women on the phone.)

WOMAN 1

Did you hear what he did to Emily's curtains?

ALICE

It is unbelievable that they're having their

Christmas party anyway. Are you going?

WOMAN 1

Oh, I don't think so.

ALICE

He practically raped Leah, you know

threatening her with those knives? It's a

miracle she escaped.

ROSALIE

I don't have anything against Sam and Emily,

but...

LEAH

I know, I know. They've got that teenage

daughter in the house. Oh, those poor things

after what happened to me can you imagine?

ROSALIE

What do you say to Emily about the Christmas

party?

ALICE

I said I hoped. We'd make it.

ROSALIE

I lied, too.

(Emily's living room)

EMILY

Jacob, do you want to give me that new

haircut?

JACOB

Again?

EMILY

yes, sure.

EMILY

It makes me proud to have you as my own

personal hairdresser.

QUIL

Hi, honey. honey.

JACOB

Quil, you want to play scissors-paper-stone?

QUIL

No.

JACOB

No, why?

QUIL

It's boring. I'm tired of always winning.

EMILY

Other people's feelings?

QUIL

I'll be outside.

EMILY

A few manners? Just never you mind. Just you

cut away. Cut away. It needs something else.

What do you think, honey?

KAYLA

More bells?

EMILY

More bells. Okay.

KAYLA

Mom, do you really think that we should be

having this party?

EMILY

Of course I think we should be having this

party. Of course I do. I mean as just what we

need is just to calm things down and then

everything will just go back to normal. Do you

have any more bells, honey?

(Kayla goes out into the garden and

sees Jacob sculpture an ice mass.

When he sculptures it, snowflakes

begin to fall, and Kayla dances in

the snow. After he finishes it, he

cuts her hand by accident. Then Edward

shows up.)

EDWARD

Get the hell out of here. Get the hell out! Go.

Freak!

SAM

Jacob, where are you going?

KAYLA

Where is he?

EDWARD

He tried to hurt you.

KAYLA

No, he did not and you know it.

EDWARD

Are you nuts? I just saw him.

KAYLA

Edward. I don't love you any more. I just want you

to go. Okay? Just go!

EDWARD

Are you serious? I'm going to lose you to that?

He isn't even human.

KAYLA

Just get out of here. Okay? Just go! Dad, did

you see where Jacob went?

SAM

Well. I don't know. He just walked down the

street.

KAYLA

Well, we have to go find him, mom?

EMILY

You...your father will find him this minute.

SAM

All in the house. I'll take care of it. I'll go

find him.

ROSALIE

Jacob! I'm calling the police!

EMILY

All that blood, sweetie, and it's just a little

cut.

(doorbell chimes.)

POLICE

Hello, I'm here to see the man with the hands.

EMILY

Oh... Uh...

POLICE

He's not here. Thank you.

EMILY

Oh, dear.

ALICE

Rosalie, did you actually see him?

ROSALIE

Yes, look.

ESME

You see, I told you he was a demon.

ALICE

Oh, don't start that stuff again.

POLICE

I'm looking for the man with scissors.

WOMEN

He went that way. You have to do something

about that.

POLICE

All right, calm down, go on home. We'll handle.

Just go home.

ROSALIE

He's a de... a demon.

WOMEN

You've got to do something! All right, Let's

see. If he's at our house come on, oh...

EMILY

I'm sure your father will find him soon.

KAYLA

What time is it?

EMILY

It's almost eight thirty. Great party, huh?

KAYLA

Where are they? God. I hope he's okay!

EMILY

So do I, honey. You know, when I brought Jacob

down here to live with us, I really didn't

think things through. And I didn't think about

what could happen to him, or to us, or to the

neighborhood. You know, I think that maybe it

might be best if he goes back up there. Because

at least there he's safe, and we'd just go back

to normal.

SAM

Now I got up by the Wiggmans, but I didn't see

him anywhere.

EMILY

Oh, dear. Oh, just... Well, let's get in the

car and go look for him.

SAM

Where's Quil now?

EMILY

He's Max'es.

SAM

Where do you think you're going, young lady?

KAYLA

With you guys.

SAM

No, you're staying here in case somebody shows

up!

EMILY

We'll be right back, dear.

JACOB

Police!

(On seeing a police car Jacob

goes back to Emily's)

KAYLA

Jacob?

JACOB

Are you okay?

KAYLA

Yes, are you okay?

JACOB

Where's everybody?

KAYLA

Out looking for you. Hold me.

JACOB

I can't.

(Kayla holds Jacob and Jacob

reflects about the inventor.)

INVENTOR

I know it's a little early for Christmas,

Jacob, but I have a present for you.

(Quil comes out of his friend's

house.)

(Edward talks with his friend.)

EDWARD

Forget holding her hand. Picture the damage he

could do other places.

EDWARD'S FRIEND

Yeah, that's sick. I feel like I'm coming to

pass out, or puke or something.

EDWARD

Later, first take me to her house.

EDWARD'S FRIEND

Come on, don't make me drive.

EDWARD

Just do it!

EDWARD'S FRIEND

Jesus, maybe she was right about you.

EDWARD

Just drive.

EDWARD'S FRIEND

Relax.

QUIL

See you tomorrow. Call me, Right?

A MAN

Have they caught him yet?

QUIL

Who?

A MAN

Him, that cripple. Let me know when they do.

Let us all you know, okay? Like a good boy.

(The car driven by Jasper comes

close to run over Quil. Jacob who

sees it saves Quil but many people

mistakenly think that Jacob tries

to kill Quil. Kayla tells Jacob to

run, and he runs away. People

follow him to the castle.)

JACOB

Oh! Are you ok? oh! owh!

QUIL

Help! Jacob help!

JACOB

I'm your friend.

QUIL

Stop! Don't! Stop! Get away, now! Somebody help

us! Help!

PEOPLE 1

What are you doing? Get away!

PEOPLE 2

Get the police!

PEOPLE 3

Somebody call the police! Hey

KAYLA

Let go of me! Why? Quil!

EMILY AND SAM

Quil! Quil! Jacob! Get away. What happened?

Jacob! Go home! Go home!

PEOPLE

Somebody call the police! Aah!

KAYLA

Edward, stop it. Get off him!

(Siren)

KAYLA

Run.

EMILY

Quil's all right! It was just the tiniest

scratch! He's gone! Let's not bother him, all

right? Let just leave him alone!

(Gunshots)

POLICE

Go on, run.

PEOPLE

What happened? Did you get him? Ok, Is he dead?

POLICE

It's all over, go on home. There's nothing more

to see. What happened out there? It's all over!

PEOPLE

I want some answers. Where is he?

PEOPLE

Get back here! I want to ask you something. Do

you see him? Wait! I want to ask you... He's in

that car. Look at that.

LEAH

I don't believe it. They don't have him. I'm

going! No! That's not a good idea!

JACOB

They are coming? Did I hurt Quil?

KAYLA

No, he's okay. He said he was just scared.

Jacob, I was so afraid. I thought you were

dead.

EDWARD

I didn't.

(Edward fires at Jacob and Kayla tries

to stop him. In their fight, Jacob

kills Edward, and then says good-by to

Kayla.)

KAYLA

Edward. Stop! Stop it, or I'll kill you myself.

EDWARD

Hey! I said stay away from her!

(Neighbor's voice)

JACOB

Goodbye!

KAYLA

I love you.

A MAN

Is he in there?

KAYLA

He's dead. The roof caved in on him. They

killed each other. You can see for yourselves.

(She raises a pair of scissorhands.)

OLD KAYLA

She never saw him again. Not after that night.

GRANDDAUGHTER

How do you know?

OLD KAYLA

Because I was there.

GRANDDAUGHTER

You could have gone up there. You still could

go.

OLD KAYLA

No, sweetheart. I'm an old woman now. I would

rather want him remember me the way as I was.

GRANDDAUGHTER

How do you know he's still alive.

OLD KAYLA

I don't know. Not for sure. But I believe he

is. You see, before he came down here, it never

snowed. And afterwards it did. If he weren't up

there now, I don't think it would be snowing.

Sometimes you can still catch me dancing in it.


End file.
